After reading Allen's letter 'Team A or Team B, MCA's still irrelevant' (Jan 2), I wish to tell him he's not alone in this. In fact, many of us believe that MCA, today, is not relevant but merely a participant in the national mainstream politics.

Allen's revelation about the funny behavior of the MCA politician is enlightening. But, I must say, those are no longer the standard operation procedures for today's MCA loggerheads.

In the fight for political survival, MCA leaders and their followers are advised to read the latest version of 'MCA infighting for dummies'.

Here are some tips:

Always carry along the party constitution, don't leave home without it.

Don't forget to also to bring along Pemuda (Youth) MCA VCD (A and B version) wherever you go. Film editing skills will make a freak show freakier.

Maintain strategic contact with VCD vendors (legal and illegal) so you can market your masterpiece at the most appropriate time.

Avoid eye contact, handshake or greeting an opposing team member when attending an open house or any function. Always arrive earlier or later than them and the same applies when leaving.

Always deny about factionalism because we are all BN supporters and we are loyal to PM.

Challenge your opposition to joint your massive resignation call. If they refuse, call for an EGM and inform the press that majority grassroots are with you.

Publish a paid-advertisement in the press advising the people not to eat or buy rotten fish head.

Always secretly record the proceeding of a meeting of any scale, any level at any place. Reveal the content to the press if the meeting went unsuccessfuly.

Always keep two versions of speeches with you - Malay speech to greet your guest, Chinese speech to ' hantam ' (slam) your opponent.

Don't keep internal investigation reports in the drawer. The public has the right to know what happen.

Tell the PM and the people that you are prepared to cooperate with the opposing team, and then take legal absence when a meeting is called.