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Dear prime minister, things are getting out of control in our Malaysia. In an age of unprecedented slander fueled by social media, your steadfast leadership has never been so necessary.

It is with the fullest heart and deepest humility that I write you with a modest proposal that may be read and considered by you to bring our country through these troubled times, and to greater heights. I wish only that you may attain the stature that your qualities promise.

It is becoming increasingly clear that democracy is ill-suited for Malaysia. Plato saw the problem with the rule of the mob, writing in The Republic: “Too much freedom, in private citizens and in the city, seems to change to nothing else except too much slavery.”

We can see how Western nations are being torn apart by the foolishness of democracy. The United States government grinds to a shutdown every year like clockwork. The British are paralyzed by damaging populist policies, the Greeks hold one ineffective referendum after another, and the Australians change their prime ministers more often than most people change their underwear.

The masses crow of freedom of speech, of religion, of press, of association, of sexuality - when in truth it is slavery to slander, excess, sin, and folly.

Take for example the Bersih rallies. Plato - and you, dear prime minister - are right. There can be too much freedom. There must be limits, decorum, discipline. Malaysia’s good name is damaged because the people would rather make a spectacle for the world to see than resolve differences of opinion like mature citizens.

Now, because your kindness of heart allowed the latest Bersih rally to carry on unchecked, we can see a dangerous trend of taking to the streets with banners and vuvuzelas for every petty complaint. Racial and religious tensions are rising. Too much freedom, and the people will destroy themselves.

I propose abandoning any pretence of democracy. Embrace tyranny.

Of course, to minds corrupted by the West, tyranny is foul. Perish the thought. Plato saw tyranny as something that arises from the rubble of democracy, like a phoenix from the ashes. Tyranny is evidence of a society evolving to the purest form of government. It is time we did away with Western notions of ‘freedom’ and ‘equality’ and ‘justice’.

Life is indeed solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short - what people really want is security and stability. Let us call tyranny by its true name: wisdom.

The course of a nation is too important to be charted by a rabble that will shout and blather for an eternity. The average Malaysian cannot even save enough for his retirement, much less plan a country’s future! We need the finest, the best, the wisest, among us to cut through the noise and lead where the mob cannot. Who else but you, dear prime minister, is qualified to do so?

Abdullah Ahmad Badawi’s mistake was congeniality. The masses smelled weakness and took advantage of it, which led to his downfall. Mahathir Mohamad, for his all his senility at present, was astute enough back in his day to know to err on the side of strength. As a result, despite the tantrums of human rights advocates, the nation flourished.

Eclipsing your predecessors

For you, dear prime minister, I know you are more than capable of eclipsing the accomplishments of your predecessors. Softness will breed contempt, and in the end the public will hate you for it. A strong hand will keep the people ever obedient, eager to earn your approval, and they will thank you for it.

You must eliminate political parties, for they are but clubs for entitled children. You must remove your cabinet entirely, for proximity to power fosters lust for power. You must dissolve parliament permanently, for parliament is but a glorified wrestling ring. You must shred the constitution, for it is an antiquated scrap of paper.

You must throttle the Internet, for it is a cancer. You must abolish elections, for they are distractions from your purpose. You must dismantle the courts, for no judge can equal your prudence. You must punish every opponent and brook no dissent, for a house divided against itself cannot stand.

As I agree with you that loyalty is more valuable than intelligence, I recommend the litmus test for a job in the civil service be loyalty to you, dear prime minister. Firing disloyal civil servants no matter how competent is no loss at all.

When you finally have absolute power, immune to critics and conspirators, you will be in the ideal position to lead our great nation. Pay no heed to those who reel out that tiresome platitude: ‘absolute power corrupts absolutely’. There is no proof that that is true. In the unlikely case it is, remember you stand above ordinary men. People will know that, if not now, then in the fullness of time, and trust you wholeheartedly.

Dear prime minister, Malaysia needs your leadership, now more than ever, and you are in a unique position to have one and all, someday, look upon your works and despair.

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