In examining a PhD thesis recently, I wrote, " this section needs meticulous editing to cut the repetitions and clarify ambiguities. Avoid padding with convoluted academic expressions when succinct writing should be used to explain your inquiry".

Readers would want to know straight up what's being investigated, how the data is gathered to arrive at the conclusion in the context of past-current arguments, and whether the contents add new insights to old issues. In the academic world, however, it's a different reality. Research papers are written in a way that often confounds rather than communicates. Many believe that obscurity reflects profundity.