SATIRE If you are the newly-made admiral of a pirate fleet plundering the Caribbean, loyalty from those under your command is perhaps one of the first things that you should look to.

That is, if you do not want an enterprising, loosely-allied captain to turn his guns on you or stick his blade into your back, while you are otherwise occupied in the heat of pitched battle, rapine or plunder.

Treasure, after all, is the rule on the high seas, and he who dares, is strong enough and possesses the cunning to pull it off, will win all the spoils.

More than one captain had to make quick work of his or her deputy or second-in-command to head off a sudden loss of height from the neck up, having to walk the plank, dangle on a hangman's noose, or, more mercifully, marooned on some godforsaken desert island off the shipping and pirating lanes.

So what would you do, before any of that unpleasant work has to take place? Even for pirates, fighting can be hard work, especially against those as ruthless and bloodthirsty as you.

Well, you make sure that only your handpicked captains and their trusted henchmen command and crew the ships under your control, much like if you are a nervous head of government with something to hide and reason to fear prosecution or discontent...