SATIRE As the Year of the Rooster in the Chinese Lunar Calendar took off last Saturday, there has been many comments about the avian and its supposed qualities made by Malaysian politicians, but true to their ilk, we may not be able to understand what came out of their mouths.

Thus herein I shall aim to explain what they really mean when they crow about roosters at the dawn of the Chinese New Year.

When the head rooster say that he hopes the year of the rooster will bring more than chicken feed to the country, it probably does not mean he hopes that everyone will feast together at the big table.

He probably hopes that the economy in the new year will bring better opportunities for him and his cronies to be able to feast on choice worms, while throwing chicken feed to the masses.

And some may want us to emulate the rooster and rise early to crow loudly in the morning, so that we can start the day early and work hard.

But that is perhaps no longer true, for the roosters of yesteryears were free agents who crow to welcome the sun and the freedom to roam in the daylight and fornicate with ‘ayams’ in the ‘rebans’.

Nowadays most roosters are kept animal, whose only purpose is to wake up early and crow loudly is because it knows the masters are watching, after all the earliest and loudest bird gets the most dedak, chicken feed that is. The climax is when the head rooster announces allocations, senatorial posts, cabinet postings and other rewards.

However, they do still take liberties with the ‘ayams’ in the ‘rebans’.

But some kept roosters do not need to get up early, for these cockerels can crow at night through their blogs, or at anytime of the day via Twitter, to continue to defend the chief rooster and earn their feed and lofty post.

And some who oppose the powers-that-be may ask us to emulate the leadership qualities of the rooster, like one state chief in a land controlled by a federal opposition party.

But that is perhaps so that like a cocky rooster that he is, one can stride around and slash one’s ‘taji’ (spurs) at others, silencing all opposition in the party as one takes control and sidelines all those who dare oppose.

Of course the ‘lame duck’ president of the same party being usurped by her deputy can ask us to remember that the rooster signifies a new dawn... but unless she herself wake up and realise herself that it is dawn, there is no hope for her party, nor any for any meaningful federal opposition pact to face off against the preening head rooster.