Visiting your elderly parents is a personal matter

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COMMENT | I asked my mum the other day if she would be upset in case she was sent to a rumah orang tua (home for the elderly) in the future.

“Why would you want to send me away when I have my own home right here?” she frowned.

I smiled, trying to ease the instant tension on her face.

“It’s a hypothetical question, Ma,” I said.

“In that case, my answer was hypothetical too,” she answered flatly.

“What if you and Dad aren’t well and I can’t take care of you?” I asked again.

“We don’t need anyone to take care of us, thank you. We are capable of taking care of ourselves.” Once again, she frowned.

“These are just a series of hypothetical questions, Ma. No need to take it to heart, okay?” I assured her.

“Good. So are my answers,” she answered while busy peeling some onions.

“What if you both need assistance and we aren’t capable of being by your side 24/7?” I pressed further.

“Nothing will happen to us. We will be okay. Allah will take care of us,” Mum said. She wasn’t about to give up.

I chuckled.

“Ma, if anything happens, rest assured that I will drop everything I am doing and be with both of you 24/7.

“But what if I cannot take care of both of you at home? What if we need special assistance from a healthcare centre or a special home?” I asked once again.

Mum stopped slicing her onions. Her eyes were watery.

“I am not crying. Don’t get any ideas,” she clarified.

I laughed as I handed her a tissue.

“No thank you, save the trees please,” she said as she wiped her eyes using her sleeves...

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