COMMENT | Dustin Hoffman was recently accused in sexual misconduct scandals, when a writer working on the set of the TV movie “Death of a Salesman” accused the actor of ‘feeling her ass four times’, repeatedly asked whether she had sex lately and told employees that he wanted to eat her left breast for lunch.

Following the scandal, a National Geographic producer also came forward and shared her experience where Hoffman repeatedly tried to get her into a hotel room and asked "if she had ever been intimate with a man over 40".

Besides the actor, there are many other Hollywood residents accused of sexual misconducts, including agents, executives, producers, directors and actors.

As Hollywood’s sex scandal keep growing, I find many of my friends eagerly discussing it, as if similar incidents never occur in Malaysia.

Unfortunately, it does.

Seven years ago, I became a single mother after my marriage ended. I was struggling emotionally and financially when a Facebook acquaintance introduced me to a theatre producer, director and writer. He seemed like a nice man.

A week later, I received a call from him, asking me out for coffee to discuss his future projects. He claimed to have good vibes about me and would like to hear about my ideas. I jumped at the opportunity and agreed to meet.

I remember meeting him at a shopping mall one evening - I put out my right hand for a formal greet, but instead of a handshake, he gave me a tight hug.

I was surprised and honestly not quite comfortable with his method of greeting. However, I consoled myself, thinking perhaps he was just a warm and friendly person.

Our meeting went pretty well. He appeared very impressed with my ideas and suggested for both of us to team up as scriptwriters for his upcoming theatre production and short films.

“We should book a room and spend all week there. That’s how it’s usually done,” he said.

“I am not quite comfortable with that,” I told him.

“Come on, if you want to be successful, you have to give your all. You have so much talent, don’t you see that?” he persuaded.

I trusted him, yet I kept imagining getting caught by the Selangor Islamic Religious Department (Jais). Yes, it sounds funny now, I know – but at the time, it was very far from funny.

Since our first meeting, he kept texting me, asking how I was doing and all that. I entertained him, of course.

The thought of a well-known producer wanting to work with a nobody like me was very engaging.

One evening, as I was getting ready for bed, I received a phone call from him. He sounded drunk and started talking about the both of us explicitly.

I hung up the phone, feeling somewhat distraught.

During our following phone conversation, I asked him about the odd phone call he had made – I needed to know if he was a man worthy of my respect.

He claimed of having no recollection of making such phone calls – I thought he must have been too drunk that night to remember and so I did not make a big deal out of it.

A month later, I was invited to his office.

“If we are going to work together, you must know everything about me. Let’s start with my office. I can also show you my collection of short films there,” he said.

Thinking that an office set up would be safer than a hotel room, I agreed.

He fetched me from a nearby station and stopped by at a wine store.

“You would like this. It’s sweet and nice,” he said.

“I don’t drink,” I replied.

“Loosen up, Fa. It’s just like apple juice,” he kept persuading.

“In that case, get me some apple juice.”

He smiled and pursued to the counter to make the purchase.

Some fifteen minutes later, we arrived at an apartment block. My heart began to palpitate.

“I thought we were heading for your office?” I asked.

“This is where my office is,” he said, leading the way with the wine bottle in his hand.

Like an idiot, I followed him. I have seen many bungalow houses transformed into offices, so I thought it made sense for an apartment unit being turned into one too.

Standing in front of the apartment unit, he took out his keys to unlock the gate. As the door was wide open, I saw no one inside. It was dark.

I knew something was not right. Yet, when he urged me to step into his office, I did exactly as told.

He showed me around the unit. The living room where he entertains guests. The kitchen where the staffs prepare snacks. The dining room where meetings are handled.

“Would you like to see my office room?” he asked.

“Sure,” I said, not at all expecting anything but to see a big table, a comfy reclining chair and some file shelves.

I did see all that. But there was one more thing in his office which I did not expect. A bed.

“Come in lah,” he said repeatedly. “Make yourself comfortable.”

I refused and stepped back into the living room. From there, I took a peek at the entrance and found it locked. And I knew at that moment, the man I was in the unit with, had some ulterior motives.

I believed the only way to escape him was to play along. So when he came to me with two glasses of wine, I urged him to turn on the TV so I could watch his short movies. He was somewhat excited at the suggestion.

For the next twenty minutes or so, I kept myself busy by commenting non-stop about his films while he kept himself busy by drinking glasses of wine, feeling somewhat proud, listening to my compliments.

“Why are you not drinking? Take a sip,” he urged.

“Later, I am engrossed with your film,” I replied.

“You know, you belong in front of the camera. You have the looks and the assets, if you know what I mean.”

I faked a smile.

He moved from his single seater and warmed the couch next to me.

“So when are we going to write together? I am okay with a week in any suitable hotels,” I said, trying to gain his trust.

With a big smile, he replied, “I will check my schedule. Don’t worry, I will take care of everything.”

I then diverted the conversation towards his family and asked about his wife and children. He took out his phone and showed me their photos as he began complaining about his wife and their unhappy marriage.

Finding the perfect opportunity, I pretended to receive a text message from my children and informed him that I had to leave because my children were not well and needed me.

At first, he hesitated.

“Please let me know once you’ve decided on the date to begin writing. It will be exciting,” I said.

“Yes, yes. Of course it will be exciting.”

He led me to the front door and unlocked them.

“I will take a taxi,” I said. “I don’t want to trouble you.”

“No trouble, I would like to send you back.”

I did not want him to know where I lived, so I politely rejected the offer and left.

I never spoke to him ever again though he tried contacting me plenty of times.

Not many people know about this incident, for those close to me who knew about it, reacted in such a way that compelled me to keep it to myself.

“Oh my god, the signs were so evident, how could you be so blind?”

“What were you wearing? Maybe your attire gave him the wrong message?”

“A woman has to be more careful. I say it was your fault alright!”

“Who in the world would get into an empty house with a stranger and expect him not to make a move?”

“You were asking for it!”

I was tried and found guilty by the people close to me.

Oddly, with the Hollywood sexual misconduct cases, no one bothered to find out what the victims were wearing or the manner the harassments took place.

Somehow in Malaysia, while we introduce more pink parking bays and ladies-only coaches claiming to protect women, the truth is, in our society, it falls upon a woman to prove that she did not encourage a man to commit any form of misconduct towards her.

But of course, Malaysians would continue to yap and yap about the Hollywood sex scandals while turning a blind eye on the same issues creeping around us.

FA ABDUL is a passionate storyteller, a growing media trainer, an aspiring playwright, a regular director, a struggling producer, a self-acclaimed photographer, an expert Facebooker, a lazy blogger, a part-time queen and a full-time vainpot.

The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of Malaysiakini.