Indonesia’s decision to ‘hold-on’ to the sending of maids to Malaysia must be a knee-jerk reaction. Indonesia should not come up with a blanket ruling to ban maids from working in Malaysia just because of some isolated cases of abuse by some Malaysian employers.

Not all maids are abused and ill-treated and not all employers are mean in this country. Let’s be more pragmatic about the whole issue.

The ideal way to resolve this problem is for the Malaysian authority to come up with a proper and periodical ‘check-on-maids’ procedure to protect maids from being abused.

The government can come up with a rule on this and try to convince the Indonesian government that ‘we are serious’ when it comes to maid abuse in the country. Malaysians do not condone maid abuse and this is our stand. Our culture abhors this despicable and inhuman act.

And to those who employ maids, please be generous, gentle and kind to them. I have this to share with you all.

Why should we ill-treat our maids? Is it necessary that maids are given a day off each week? These are the two issues being hotly discussed by many interested parties in the country.

Essentially, a maid is as human as anyone else. A maid should be treated with respect. If you are kind to her she will, in turn, be kind to you. But then, some would say that there are bad apples among them. But then, there are also bad apples among the employers.

If a maid cannot perform her duty to the employer’s expectation, a respectful way of rejecting her is by sending her back to the agency, or courteously making them return to their home country. Torturing her is shameful and dishonourable.

These maids are poor women who have to come to this country to seek a decent living. It is poverty that has driven them to this country. Some have left their children and loved ones to come here to earn a living. They hence deserve to be treated sensibly.

Of course, employers cannot expect faultlessness in them. As employers, we need to bear with their inadequacies and inexperience and learn to be tolerant with them. With time, they would be able to adjust and adapt to our expectations. If still they fail you, send them back gracefully.

As for a day off each week, it all depends on the maid. When I mentioned this matter to my maid, she responded politely, ‘Tak perlu Pak. Nanti bikin susah semua orang.’

I understand why she responded this way. She has been with us for the past 15 years. She would only go out of the house with us or with our children. She has demanded nothing from us more than what we pay her. Neither do we pay her a fortune.

She is not bothered about that and had never asked for a salary rise since. The reason is, she finds it happy to stay with us and that matters most to her. Her secret desire in life is to perform the Haj one day. We have decided to help her fulfil this wish.

What’s more, we have treated her just like one of us. We have taken her as part of our family. Our children are more attached to her as she spends all her time with them when we are busy with our jobs. We eat whatever she cooks. We often seek her opinions on matters that we find difficult to resolve as parents.

On her part, she is willing to learn anything she can to please our family. My children have officially included her as part of the family in all the forms they fill up in when at school. When we are away or outstation, she takes charge of the house and the children.

She has lived with us with a lot of trust built in. This attachment has made us feel that she is indeed a faithful human and is essentially part of our family unit.

We are not saying that all maids are the same. We consider it very lucky to have a maid who has stayed with us this long. On our part, it all boils down to how we treat her. We treat her well and she has treated us well in return.

This formula has worked for us and we are happy about it. We also hope that this formula will work for others. So when we offered her a day off each week, she does not want it. Thus, let it be the way she decides. This makes us a lot happier.