FEATURE | Noah, 28, is meeting a client to rent out his car for the afternoon.

His clients are university students in the area, so he is mostly busy during the day and very free at night.

He has not slept for three days thanks to crystal meth, and is repeatedly haunted by hallucinations.

Throughout the day a voice tells him someone is coming after him and that his life is in peril. Every passer-by feels like a would-be attacker.

Crystal meth, short for crystallised methamphetamine, is a powerful stimulant, known for its capacity to not only remove inhibitions but to set the user on a frenzy, accelerating sexual desire, energy and often times, aggression.

This is why driving home today, Noah feels no fatigue.

In fact, he is even more energised having taken an extra gram of crystal meth the night before at a cost of RM250 per gram. But it could also cost his life.

Strange men

Waking up at his apartment in Petaling Jaya the next day, Noah finds his housemate Peter worriedly waiting for him on the sofa.

For months, different men have been coming and going through their apartment. Some stay for just a day, but others stay for up to three months.

The men are Noah’s chemsex partners - referred to as such because they only ever have sexual relations under the influence of drugs usually crystalllised methamphetamine, gamma-hydroxybutyrate (GHB) or mephedrone.

Mephedrone is hardly accessible in Malaysia, so active chemsex drug users in the country prefer crystal meth or GHB, which are banned for recreational use but still accessible on the black market.

“The sex was good, you can be erect for hours without ejaculation, and you will get a really good feeling. It exaggerates your sensation,” he said.

Ejaculation usually comes only hours later.

“I started by using condoms but it wasn’t satisfying. The sex could last for hours and you don’t feel like having rubber between skins.

“I am trying to enhance my sexual satisfaction by doing chemsex so there is no point of wearing condom,” he said.

Noah was diagnosed with HIV in February 2017.

In his twenties, he looks like the boy next door in his nerdy glasses and haircut. Up until April last year, he was really just that.

A traumatic personal incident triggered depression, and crystal meth was his way to cure the pain. Sex came with it.

Dating apps

For Noah, the introduction to chemsex came with Grindr - a dating app primarily used by gay men to find sexual or romantic partners.

Some of the app users would openly list out their intention, by typing “chilling”, “cf” (chemfun) or the emoji of an ice cube to attract those with a mutual interest - having casual sex under the influence drugs.

While chemsex happens in many different circles, the phenomenon is prominent within the homosexual community.

There is little research on the matter in Malaysia but UK studies find the prevalence of chemsex in the homosexual community stems from the higher drug use, as a way to cope with the difficulties of life as a homosexual person.

Chemsex is also a way to drown out other worries, said Noah, who says one record “chemfun” session found him engaging in sex with several partners for four days straight.

“Part of the reason I keep looking for different partners, is that I don’t feel like being alone. The bad memories would haunt me,” he said.

“Sometimes the hookup partner would stay with me for hours and I would need to find something to say to them.”

These drugs induce euphoria and reduce inhibitions to the extent that the user might have little idea who they're having sex with, let alone ensure the sex is safe.

“The experienced users like to approach youths. They would first offer the drugs for free, drawing on youth curiosity.”

Silence, secrecy, and stigma

Because little research has been conducted into chemsex in Malaysia, there is a lack of reliable statistics about the number of men involved.

Silence, secrecy and stigma may prevent men deep in the chemsex scene from seeking help, but it also may explain why the men ventured into chemsex in the first place.

“Having sex under influence of drugs is like having KFC,” said Danny, explaining that it was an act of free will.

“You won’t go for the normal oily chicken, which is tasteless after that. KFC is full of flavor, crunchy and delicious, whereas the one neither crunchy nor tasty.

“It’s so different. You won’t want to go for sober sex after a taste of chemsex.”

Danny, 42, who works in a prestigious corporate firm, started having chemsex ten years ago.

“I met this stranger at Grindr who asked me if I would like to try chemfun. My first thought was, ‘Okay this should be like shisha’,” he said.

“The hook-up buddy mixed some other drugs into a cocktail. I drank it, without further questions. It was a combination of Ecstasy and Foxy.”

Foxy is a type of tryptamine which is abused for its hallucinogenic effects while Ecstasy is a type of methamphetamine popularly used in the dance music scene.

Those who are involved in chemsex are usually user of multiple substances, believing that a cocktail of drugs could lead to higher sexual pleasure.

Cocktail of drugs

Chemsex became something regular for Danny after that, going from once a month to twice a week.

For the first five years, it was only with other men but the experienced now includes women, some of whom he meets through dating apps and in orgies at chemsex parties.

“The highest record we had was seven of us in the sex party,” he said.

“The hookup buddies just come and go. We don’t even know each other’s names or contact details.

“We got to know each other via apps, and that’s it. For those who are into chemsex, they will come as long as you have chem, or we can mention cost sharing.”

Danny says he is now addicted to crystal meth, GBL, Foxy, Viagra and Ecstacy. Viagra, he said, is a must to help with erections.

The addiction has changed his attitude towards his career and personal life, he said, with chemsex an essential for stress elimination.

“We, who do chemsex are known as pure evil in the community. Because they would define us as willing to do anything or even to lie, as long as we can get the things that we are keen for.

“I want to go home earlier (from work), I want to meet people and I want to have fun.”

‘Main cause of infection’

Like Noah, Danny too has been diagnosed as HIV positive but continues to have unprotected chemsex.

At chemsex parties, he said, those who are HIV positive opt to go without condoms when with each other because there is no risk of reinfection.

However, in a survey in Kuala Lumpur in 2011, 45 percent of the men surveyed said they had unprotected anal sex with a casual male partner in the past six months.

About a quarter of those men surveyed do so under the influence of drugs, the study published in the International Journal of STD & AIDS found.

Coupled with the rate of HIV transmission from male to male sex of a significant 19 percent, it paints a troubling picture.

“In Malaysia, chemsex is fast becoming the main cause of HIV infection among young men,” PT Foundation said in an outreach Facebook posting.

“Most chem users think they know how to control their consumption and their behaviour. Our experience with the people we see contracting HIV suggests otherwise,” said the foundation, which works in HIV/AIDS prevention and care.

Even so, there is no data to show the HIV transmission rate from chemsex.

In his sexual forays, Danny often bumps into young men - and teenagers as young as 14 - who share their intention to try chemsex.

He advises them of the risks of having chemsex which is almost always unprotected, and the risks of using methamphetamines.

The drug has been documented to cause psychosis if taken in high doses, leading to coma and death. These are things Danny has at the back of his mind.

“I don’t feel sad or angry. I am just wondering how many people out there are going through the same thing.”

Names have been changed to protect the interviewees’ privacy.

Tomorrow: The doc who helps white-collar meth addicts