I write to share my trepidation and personal reaction to the recent appointment of Dr Awang Adek Hussin as the head of Umno Bachok. As a long standing Umno member of that branch, I am personally pleased with the move. I have been impressed with Awang Adek for some time now and I think he is going to be an Umno shining star.

This impressive and credentialed kampong boy comes from a humble beginning and makes something out of his life and of course, has all the markings of a budding politician. My trepidation is whether his present easy going and approachable demeanor and availability will be sustained as he moved higher up the political ladder. As is usually the case with Umno politicians, the higher they are up there, the harder or more cumbersome it is for common folks like me to reach and get hold of them.

Perhaps Umno politicians should learn a thing or two from PAS politicians: forever humble and unassuming and feeling at ease mingling with ordinary rakyat without resorting to pontificate or even worse acting more like a pseudo-sultan making all sorts of pronouncements.

My trepidation is if he stands as a candidate in the upcoming general election. As much as I admire and like Awang Adek the person, I have issues with Umno and its dominant cultural milieu that permeates within the party especially of late. I think an upcoming politician like Awang Adek would reach greater height and gain more credibility had there been some kind of grassroots election where common and ordinary party members like myself have the chance to vote for the leader we want.

I concur with a lot of my fellow kampong folks whom I have talked to that Awang Adek would be elected to head the branch simply on his merits and impressive persona that he brings had there be a branch election. Like any new upcoming politician, he avails himself readily to all kampong folks. But again, within Umno itself, Abdullah Badawi, the head honcho of Umno was himself never elected to his present position. He too was appointed. Thus, my trepidation.

What this says to me is that I, as an ordinary Umno member, do not matter in the larger scheme of things. Umno imperils itself by ignoring grassroots members like my kampong folks and I. If this feeling of mine is getting stronger, what makes Umno think that I will be casting my vote for a Barisan Nasional candidate during the upcoming election? My trepidation will get stronger as the voting day nears. Do I vote for Awang Adek the person (if he is the candidate) or against Umno for all the misdeeds especially in ignoring grassroots members like me?

Awang Adek and his fellow shining stars of Umno have not discussed their visions of how they want to lead us. They seem more fixated with spending their times on upsmanship maneuvers against PAS rather than fixing the rot within the party from getting worse. From the perspective of my fellow kampong folks and I, Umno is rudderless with no clear mission or direction: all it does these days is reacting to PAS. Umno sails towards wherever PAS blows the winds. While PAS seems to be more voter-friendly, Umno is busy being ever more secretive and at times appear to behave more like a school-yard bully (MB Adnan of Pahang pronouncement over flags recently is a prime example).

The endless shanigans from the likes of Adnan, Shahidan, Rustam and Zam repulse us the ordinary kampong folks even more. As a Malay custom dictates, we are not about to verbalise out loud our disapprovals but will silently register our disgust in our own way. Perhaps, a voting

ballot is an appropriate avenue. It is a chosen path of having to do away with direct confrontation and thus respecting the long tradition of a face-saving custom!

In spite of my personal admiration for Awang Adek, I wonder if my voting for him will contribute and prolong the malaise within the Malaysian parliamentary system. Umno at the national level prides itself to efforts of continuing the Mahathir policies (and perhaps his style of leadership). With the present leadership and dominant cultural milieu within Umno as I see it, it leads me to believe that Umno will remain status quo.

Umno as it governs the country does not seem to demonstrate a sense of fair play and continues

to blur the boundaries between party politics and the overall interests of the rakyat and country. Umno is getting deeper into kowtowing to a few select individuals at the expense of ordinary folks like me. So why should I vote for a party that is on its way to self destruction?

What I wish for Awang Adek is for him to be radical and bold enough to lead the party to revert to the fundamentals. Let us be more democratic and by that inculcate the culture and behaviour that respect democratic principles. In the Malaysian context, let parliament be dominant, not the executive. People's representatives should rein supreme in our land, not what is it today.

I wish for Awang Adek to fight to make the parliament a rubber stamp not a day longer, a judiciary not subservient to the executive. Do not be afraid of our own shadows and be transparent.

I wish Awang Adek to fight to make Umno a leading coalition party that is able to demonstrate its willingness to accept accountability along with the responsibility of governing. Let us do away with the ever secretive off-the-budget appropriations and out of parliamentary preview and let us not prosecute the messengers but pay more attention to the messages.

Leaders like Awang Adek need to ultimately acknowledge that every single voter counts and their inputs matter and no more of the top-down culture that is anti democratic. Umno needs to do a real, genuine (without sugarcoating) assessment of why more and more folks in my kampong and I are disenchanted, disillusioned with the present cultural milieu within the party and for heaven's sake, please do not take us for granted.

We know what a sham show is and I hope that Umno leaders will now realise why we voted against our own party during the last general election? We, the grassroots members are demonstrating that it is not that we love Umno less, but we love Malaysia more.

Now what we need are a few brave men such as Dr Awang Adek Hussin to lead the charge.