SPECIAL REPORT In conjunction with the 53rd anniversary of the Federation of Malaysia yesterday, Malaysiakini highlighted the stories of three inter-racial couples.

Their union is not unlike the union of Peninsular Malaysia, Sabah and Sarawak, as they overcame cultural and religious differences as one.

In this second instalment of the two-part series, Malaysiakini follows the stories of two more such couples.

Here are their stories:

[Editor’s note, Aug 28, 2023: This portion of the article has been removed upon request.]

Sophia Wong Woon Kuan, 33, & Izan Mohamed, 40

When Sophia Wong Woon Kuan first came to Kuala Lumpur, she was all alone.

Travelling all the way from Perak, she barely knew anyone in the city and making new friends was not easy for her then.

“Back then, I travelled to my new accommodation by LRT. When I shifted to an apartment, I actually took the stuff myself and shifted the things bit by bit,” Wong said.

That same was true with her now husband, Izan Mohamed, a Sarawakian Malay who came to the city at the end of the 90s.

“When he first came to KL, he went through the similar challenges I faced. He had nobody and had to make his way around in the strange city,” Wong said.

“He did not have a proper education background, he worked in factories, in garment factories, as a store check clerk and other such jobs.”

Eventually, Izan moved on and became a marketing executive, and that was when they both first met.

Wong joined as a new staff in a multinational company and both were colleagues in 2008.

“It was actually love in first sight,” Wong smiled.

“There were some Chinese guys asking me out, and I wasn’t attached that time. But I didn’t see in them what is in him, Izan.

"They, Izan and the other guys, were at the same level but Izan’s journey to be where he is is what attracted me to him," she said.

Both started dating secretly. When both were in the office, they pretended that they didn’t know each other.

Izan comes from a conservative family background. The couple started meeting each other’s family a year after they began dating.

“She followed me for a visit to my parents, and they didn’t know anything about us then,” Izan said.

“My parents said it was up to me to decide, as long as she’s willing to convert. They didn’t want us under one roof, with two different religions.”

When they decided to get married, Wong converted before their marriage.

“Both of our parents know that we are stubborn and headstrong persons. No one can stop us,” said Wong.

Malay and Chinese weddings

In Wong's family, her parents were very open with her decision.

“I was worried about her parents. I didn’t have a house or car, I was worried if they were going to accept me,” said Izan.

To his surprise, Wong's dad was was very relaxed with the future son-in-law.

“My dad said, ‘if you don’t have RM300,000 dowry, it’s okay, don’t even think about it’. He didn’t want to burden Izan financially,“ said Wong.

They had two wedding ceremonies, one in Kuching and one in Perak.

“We did the wedding in Kuching Malay style, while in Perak we did it in the traditional Chinese way,” said Izan.

“We held a kenduri in Malay style, while our pelamin is a Chinese one. We had tanglung (lanterns) and red clothes.”

Wong converted willingly, although she still went through some struggles internally.

“To be honest, I didn’t really want to convert. One thing I really respect about him is that Izan respects the individuality of a person. For him, he doesn’t impose on me,” she said.

“If our nation's (law) allowed it, he would not want me to convert, and I won’t want to convert as well.”

Wong had some struggles after converting.

“When people asked me if I still eat my mum’s cooking, I said yes. It doesn’t have to be pork. My mum can cook anything.

"But for those people, in general they think I shouldn’t eat whatever my mum cooks,” she said.

The couple have two children, one is four years old and the other is four months old.

“Our elder child doesn’t know what is race. Because we never tell him if he is a Malay, if he is a Chinese or if he is half Malay, half Chinese,” Wong said.

“He sees ‘Malay’ and ‘Chinese’ as just some languages. He cannot speak both these languages now, so when people ask his about his race, he would just say, ‘I am English’.”

For Izan, he prefers his children to learn English at a young age and then pick up Malay afterwards.

“Along the way, they will pick up Malay,” he said.

“We will just put him in a Chinese school to learn Chinese,” said Wong.

The parents also make it a point not to expose their children to racial stereotypes.

“Our elder son will ask why some people are having darker skin, and I just tell him because that person spent too much time playing under the sun,” Izan said.

The couple don’t want their children to stereotype about any race and are optimistic about inter-racial relationships in the country.

“I think, for the future generations, some parents may have experienced the kind of inter-racial love that could not get to the marriage stage. They may have this regret.

"I think this generation of frustrated lovers may become more open minded for the next generation because they have been through the pain of breaking-up due to differences in race and religion,” said Wong.

“Or, they might become so bitter that they will tell the children to save themselves from heartaches.”

Yesterday: A M’sian union - interracial couples share their stories