This year, I greeted Merdeka amidst deep feelings of disquiet and uneasy anguish. It has become a recurrent theme of my melancholy. Aug 31 st has come around again - Hari Kemerdekaan , Independence Day.

Before I go on, I want to state that I'm not politically-affiliated and do not belong to any political party. I consider myself a liberal Malaysian, and have always been advocating a kinder, more sensible, more cohesive, more efficient and less corrupt Malaysia. I'm passionately inclined to supporting a radical yet peaceful change for a better Malaysia.

I begin this way, knowing that in Malaysia these days, everyone is now a potentially vocal commentator with their freedom to express themselves!

Still, I continue to hope that more common sense and reason will prevail. I'm an unabashed believer in more constructive if idealistic rational discourse and less rhetoric.

I was born two years after the Malayan liberation, too young to understand the significance of what 'Merdeka' meant. But later, my late father (one who was ever so apolitical) would remind me that it was one of those life-defining moments of epiphany, with the nationwide rousing shouts of pride of "Merdeka, Merdeka, Merdeka!"

Now 52 years on, this appears somewhat hollow, too meaningless, too unfelt. Was it truly freedom to decide our own fate, our own lives, and our destinies? Have we really been liberated?

Or has this been replaced with an even more destructive social disintegration, political uncertainty and perhaps a growing sense of hopelessness? I wonder.

The rise of the blogosphere and alternative media through the world wide web, has opened up and exposed that untameable genie in the bottle, never again to be contained.

While, this ungovernable cyberspace has fostered unimaginable information traffic, and unlocked many secrets, exposes, and countless exchanges for the better, there is another sinister side, which has emerged.

This unleashed genie of free expression too, is fraught with disturbing half-truths, irrational bigotry and unrestrained viciousness of its own. Personally declared but intolerant righteousness have been spewed behind the facade of perceived anonymity of the Internet.

Can anyone believe anything at all in the web? Certainly not everything, but the dilemma is in knowing which is which.

I think many Malaysians are now so intoxicated by their own anger, hatred and righteousness that many are no longer listening, except to their own voices and other like-minded echoes they surround themselves with.

We are no longer thinking about how some of these seemingly implacable problems can be resolved. We just want to see instant results, provoke instant reaction, we behave as if the politics of the land is a playground for the brave and loud. But, what about how to really run a government of our choice, of virtue?

I know we all think we are contributing to this concept of change, that we must begin with each and every one person in Malaysia. I believe this too, passionately, but I must be aware of the prevailing realities and maintain a step-back patience.

Sometimes, the loudest most strident voice is not necessarily that most listened to; some people would be very quick to switch off immediately, and we would not be listened to at all, except from the already converted.

The more serious consequences would be the possible repercussions of retaliatory anger, hatred, and vengeance.

We can all help to lessen the tenor and the tempo of recriminations and deep-seated anger and try and temper down the growing ill will that is brewing and boiling over in our blogosphere and possibly also in our civil society!

We stand ready to lose and exclude another huge segment of our society, who are our fellow citizens too, albeit on the other side of the fence. Worse, we may be kindling something more unthinkable, more sinister and terrible! I do hope I'm wrong and will be proven so!

Let's help reduce the political tension, while continuing to push our agenda with less animosity but with greater moral suasion!

God help us! Have a thoughtful Merdeka!