COMMENT | Over the past months, I have lost two friends. One, a 61-year-old to brain cancer. She opted for “voluntary assisted dying” (VAD), also known as “euthanasia”, which is legal in most of Australia.

Another, a 67-year-old. He died at home, at night, from a heart attack.

When friends die young unexpectedly, the shocking news stirs up many evasive questions that don’t have ready answers. The mind tries to make sense of the nonsensical. The self turns inwards. My mind reels back to the moments I had spent with them.

What was our last conversation? What was it about? A joke, a banter, an unsettled argument, or nothing particularly significant? What was left unsaid between us? Where did we stop, assuming there would be another time to catch up over a drink?

Yes, when kith and kin die abruptly, the mind plays up many questions about the order of life, the fragility of the time I have left, whatever work I have yet to “finish”, and the gratitude I have yet to show.

Knowing that life had ended mid-way for my friends, how should...