LEADERSHIP | When the going gets tough, the tough get going
LEADERSHIP | Why are some people able to “bounce back” from major setbacks in life and at work whilst others are overwhelmed by them and behave in self-defeating ways? Why are some people able to adapt quickly to new circumstances and thrive in constant change whilst others feel helpless and fail to embrace change? Why are some people able to sustain goal-directed energy when faced with obstacles whilst others crumble under pressure?
The answer to these three questions is resilience, which is crucial for continuous success in today’s rapidly changing and turbulent world. Resilient people often succeed where more intelligent and talented people fail. As succinctly stated by Robert Schuller, a personal development guru, “Tough times never last; but tough people do.”
An excellent example of a highly resilient individual is Abraham Lincoln. He lost Congressional campaigns twice in 1843 and 1846, and was also defeated twice for the Senate in 1855 and 1858. Yet in 1860, Lincoln won the presidential election and became the 16th president of the United States (1861- 65).
Many people fail to build better lives or to optimise their potential due to poor resilience. A good example of poor resilience is that of Jerry (not his real name). Jerry lost his managerial job two years ago due to poor performance at work. Instead of being self-reflective and self-correcting, he started blaming his boss and others for his predicament. Today, he is still jobless and survives on the salary of his wife, a lecturer in a local university.
The good news is that all of us have the capacity for resilience. Resilience involves thoughts, actions and behaviour that can be learned and acquired by anyone...
LEADERSHIP | Why are some people able to “bounce back” from major setbacks in life and at work whilst others are overwhelmed by them and behave in self-defeating ways? Why are some people able to adapt quickly to new circumstances and thrive in constant change whilst others feel helpless and fail to embrace change? Why are some people able to sustain goal-directed energy when faced with obstacles whilst others crumble under pressure?
The answer to these three questions is resilience, which is crucial for continuous success in today’s rapidly changing and turbulent world. Resilient people often succeed where more intelligent and talented people fail. As succinctly stated by Robert Schuller, a personal development guru, “Tough times never last; but tough people do.”
An excellent example of a highly resilient individual is Abraham Lincoln. He lost Congressional campaigns twice in 1843 and 1846, and was also defeated twice for the Senate in 1855 and 1858. Yet in 1860, Lincoln won the presidential election and became the 16th president of the United States (1861- 65).
Many people fail to build better lives or to optimise their potential due to poor resilience. A good example of poor resilience is that of Jerry (not his real name). Jerry lost his managerial job two years ago due to poor performance at work. Instead of being self-reflective and self-correcting, he started blaming his boss and others for his predicament. Today, he is still jobless and survives on the salary of his wife, a lecturer in a local university.
The good news is that all of us have the capacity for resilience. Resilience involves thoughts, actions and behaviour that can be learned and acquired by anyone.
According to Al Siebert, a leading psychologist, resilience refers to “the ability to cope well with high levels of ongoing disruptive change; sustain good health and energy when under constant pressure; bounce back easily from setbacks; overcome adversities; change to a new way of working and living when an old way is no longer possible; and do all these without acting in dysfunctional or harmful ways.” Karen Reivich and Andrew Shatté, two expert psychologists, define resilience simply as “the ability to persevere and adapt when things go awry.”
Simply put, resilience is essentially the ability to bounce back quickly from setbacks or misfortune and to adapt well to life-changing experiences.
Key features of resilient people
The key elements of resilience are realistic optimism, accurate thinking, high self-esteem, an internal locus of control, perseverance and flexibility.
1. Realistic optimism. Resilient people are optimistic. They believe that things can change for the better, and consequently, take the necessary action towards making them happen.
2. Accurate thinking. Resilient people do not deny reality; they take into consideration both the positive and negative aspects of a situation. They accurately evaluate themselves and others, and accurately determine the true causes of problems.
3. High self-esteem. Resilient people have a positive view of themselves and confidence in their strengths and abilities.
4. Internal locus of control. Resilient people believe that they have influence over their own fate; they have some control over their lives or what happens to them through their own behaviour.
5. Perseverance. Resilient people do not give up easily; they persist until they succeed in attaining their goals.
6. Flexibility. Resilient people are quick to adapt to changes in life and the work environment.
Adversities and major setbacks are part of life. Hence, every one of us needs resilience to steer successfully through adversities and setbacks. Indeed, the ability to adapt has become more crucial in the 21st century which is characterised by rapid change in virtually every aspect of our lives.
Coping successfully with change necessitates a high degree of resilience. Scientific research has powerfully demonstrated that resilience is crucial for success at work, psychological wellbeing, and satisfaction in life.
Many intelligent and talented people have failed to become high achievers due to the lack of resilience. Success often depends upon staying power. Winners are generally ordinary people with extraordinary resilience. They are willing to do whatever it takes to attain their goals. Resilience helps to transform hardship into challenge, failure into success, and helplessness into power.
Organisations too need people who are resilient – people who can adapt quickly to changes in the workplace and tackle challenging problems confidently and effectively. Research shows that employees who are resilient are more productive, get sick less often, and handle stress better.
10 tips on bolstering resilience
1. Develop authentic self-esteem that is grounded in reality. Discover your true self. Recognise and utilise fully your strengths. Learn to love yourself for you are unique. Do not compare yourself negatively with others. Have trust in your abilities to handle specific challenges in life. Remember that you will never know what you can do until you try.
2. Maintain perseverance. Persist until you succeed in overcoming a particular adversity. Treat failures as learning experiences or stepping stones to subsequent success. Remember that Thomas Alva Edison discovered the right filament of carbonised thread for the electric light bulb in 1879 after performing about 1,200 experiments! Read inspirational literature when you are feeling down. Associate yourself with positive or nourishing friends who can recharge your battery.
3. Accept the fact that life is not a bed of roses. Change and disruptions are part of life. Perceive bad times as temporary times. Count your blessings instead of wallowing in self-pity. Treat adversities as valuable lessons learned.
4. Build up a strong social support system. Foster good relationships with close family members, sincere friends or colleagues. Talking with trusted and helpful people not only diminishes the impact of an adversity but also bolsters one’s sense of self-worth and self-competence.
5. Accept 100% responsibility for your life and actions. You may not be able to completely alter your circumstances; however, do remember that you can at least make some changes that can significantly modify your circumstances for the better in the long haul.
6. Have complete faith in yourself. Expect things to work out well; never view yourself as a helpless victim when faced with an adversity. Practise positive self-talk.
7. Develop a good sense of humour. Laughter is a great stress reliever as it stimulates relaxation. Watch a funny movie or a play.
8. Maintain realistic optimism. Keep things in perspective; avoid blowing a painful event out of proportion. Remind yourself daily about the goals to be attained. Be prepared to modify your goals due to changing circumstances.
9. Solve problems rationally. Identify accurately the causes of problems and come up with numerous possible solutions. Trust your instincts. Never jump to conclusions and avoid wasting time thinking about factors that are beyond your control.
10. Lead a healthy lifestyle. Maintain your health through proper nutrition, exercise and sufficient rest. Engage in activities that you find relaxing and enjoyable. Take vacations regularly to rejuvenate yourself or to view challenges as opportunities to conquer new ground.
To conclude, remember that what ultimately matters in life is not what happens to you, but rather how you respond to what happens to you. Hence, bolster your resilience to face bravely adversities in life or to attain your cherished goals.
RANJIT SINGH MALHI is a widely-quoted authority on self-leadership, peak performance and soft skills. He has written six books on personal excellence, soft skills and management, three of which have been translated into Arabic.
The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of Malaysiakini.
