Sir, excuse me, but may I ask what you have there in your yard?

It's a submarine.

You mean like at Disneyland?

No, like the Singapore Navy.

You're kidding.

No, I have a contract from the government.

To build a submarine ...?

Yes.

That goes under water ...?

Certainly, what else?

You're going to build it here in your yard?

Yes. It's only a prototype.

You mean there are to be more?

Yes. Lots more. The government is going into submarines in a big way. We may corner the world market.

Why is the government interested in submarines?

I can't tell you, it is an official secret.

But you do know, don't you?

Actually, no ...

Sir, have you ever built a submarine before?

No. Is that important?

How did you get the contract, if you haven't built a submarine before? They asked me. I told them I could, and they believed me. There was an interview. Some papers to sign. That was it.

Was there a tender for the contract?

What's that?

What gave them the idea that you could build a submarine in your yard? I was a fisherman on my uncle's boat for a while, and I acquired the necessary experience. I also have a friend in the government.

How much is the contract for?

It's an official secret. National defence.

Is it enough to build a schoolhouse?

Oh yes, lots of schoolhouses.

Is this submarine going to have diesel motors for power, or nuclear reactors?

It hasn't been decided yet. We don't have nuclear capability in Malaysia yet, and the diesel boats are too noisy, so it's something of a problem. Anyhow, I have the contract, that's all that matters.

Where are you going to get sailors who can operate a submarine? The Admiral is assigned to that.

Admiral?

Well, he is an Admiral now.

Where will the training take place?

We have built a new training facility. It has a few bugs to be worked out. We are doing research on the cement, sand and water ratio. We'll get it soon.

Is there a curriculum for instruction yet?

No, we are still building the swimming pool. The contractor is having trouble. It's a big pool.

Are you going to launch the submarine into the swimming pool? I don't know. It hasn't been decided. A lot of the details are still to be settled. It's not spelled out in the contract. These little things aren't important, we can work it all out. We have engineering capability to build our own car you know. Malaysia Boleh ! The main thing is the contract. You look puzzled.

Oh, sorry. I was thinking about schoolhouses.

HARUN RASHID is a scientist avidly interested in the application of Islamic principles in international affairs. The promotion of goodwill through civilisational dialogue motivates his writing. His Worldview column is a personal analysis of Malaysian affairs from a global perspective.