Dear Dina,

It's snowing here in my place. Christmas came and went, and the malls and shopping complexes are still packed with buyers.

My 5 year old daughter asked me yesterday," Abah, we do not celebrate Christmas right?

"Yes, we do not," I said.

"But why?"

"Because we are Muslims, we celebrate Hari Raya."

"Is Hari Raya like Christmas, Abah?"

"Well, sort of."

"Why didn't I get a gift for Hari Raya like Christmas?"

"Because we don't have Santa Claus."

"But I like Santa, because he will bring toys to me."

"Yes, yes Abah, WE LOVE SANTA," my 3 year daughter old joined in.

Jingle bells

I was really in a dilemma. Have I not tried enough to teach them about Islam? I asked my wife, where did they get all this Santa-bring-me-a-toy-thing? Last year, we didn't have any issues like this. My darling wife told me that there was a Christmas party at my second daughter's playschool, and Santa was there. Oh okay, now I got it.

You see, that's the kind of things that we Muslims abroad face every now and then. On one hand, we want to stick to our Malay traditions, Islamic culture and teachings, on the other hand, we don't have the heart to bar our children from joining in the celebrations. They are children anyway. Which kid doesn't want toys, even if its from a pot bellied, snow colored bearded old man?

This reminded me of the time when I was living in Europe. In my kind of work, sometimes I have the opportunity to mingle with prominent figures. It just so happened that the late Pope John Paul II was visiting the country I was working in and I had the opportunity to take my picture with him. When I went back to Malaysia for my sister's wedding, (you know la wedding, mesti havoc ). Someone saw the picture in my digital camera and believe it or not, made a stupid issue of it, for having me being next to the Pope, him being the holiest person in Roman Catholic hierarchy.

How can you do that?

Do what?

Take picture with The Pope?

Why not?

Well, he's the head of Roman Catholic Church.

So what?

He's the ultimate Nasrani.

And?

Are you going to convert?

I was speechless. "Well, of course not, I am a Muslim. My faith is Islam," I replied.

Then, how could you have your picture taken with him?

Tolerance and an open heart

We Malaysian Muslims always talk about our image as the moderate ones, there are no extremists in our country, we are liberal, we live harmoniously along side each other with our different beliefs and faith, and yet this guy shot all that down with a comment like that. I don't know what to say.

During the last Ramadhan, my 5 year old started fasting. We vigorously reminded her that she could not eat and drink during the day. She was so happy to wake up for sahur, and didn't even complain. Even my one and half year old daughter woke up because of the commotion. (Yes, I have 3 daughters).

We talked to her teacher, Mrs Byrd the day before and explained to her that we wished to train our daughter to fast. When we picked her up from school, Mrs Byrd was waiting for us and her face beamed.

"Mr M, I am happy to report that your daughter did not eat and drink today even with all the Halloween candies in the classroom.(My daughter's school was having a Halloween Day). I am so proud of her," she said.

My wife and I, were of course touched by her concern and encouragement for my five year old daughter, even though Mrs Byrd was not Muslim.

Dear Dina,

Being a Muslim abroad, means that you have to adapt to your environment without compromising your beliefs. For our children, it's very tough and confusing. At their age, they will not understand whatever you tell them. What I do however is try to explain to her and her sisters that there a lot of religious festivals being celebrated by different people of different faiths, Hari Raya and Christmas among them. I hope I can teach them about the differences and how to be understanding with other people's religions and practices which is what Islam is really about.

Serve Allah, and join not any partners with Him; and do good- to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, those in need, neighbours who are near, neighbours who are strangers, the companion by your side, the wayfarer (ye meet), and what your right hands possess: For Allah loveth not the arrogant, the vainglorious. (Surah An Nisa' 4:36)

M and his family live in America. He and his wife are happy to inform that their five year old daughter managed to complete a full fasting month under Mrs Byrd encouragement, support and her watchful eyes.

M is still trying to figure out how to tell his daughters that Santa is not real.