This article reflects on the emergence of suicide bombers. I have tried to walk a mile in their shoes and witness life through their perspective. Although it's a reflective piece, it is not a figment of my imagination.

It has come into existence after a series of dialogues with the Palestinian youth that has provided me with valuable insights to their lives and thoughts. I strongly believe that sensitivity to the plight of Palestinians would be a strong motivator to stop suicide bombings.

For the Western youth with no strings attached to the Middle East, the Israel/Palestine conflict might as well be happening in outer space  of awakening the soul by simply walking a mile in their shoes and, most importantly, the will to care.

Circumstantial sufferers

As I probed into the core of the matter, I realised that most suicide bombers are circumstantial sufferers. What propels people into such action is a long history of humiliation and deep suffering. Sufferings, directly or indirectly, are responsible for kindling the fire that gives rise to, as Palestinians would put it, 'Martyrdom Operations.'

Let's transcend into the world of a 19-year-old Palestinian boy whose surroundings could someday turn him into a suicide bomber. For a moment imagine this

You live in a Palestinian refugee camp. Your father earns just enough to feed your family one square meal a day. You study hard to make a decent living. Respect in society is important  after all, you are the underdog here. Never mind that the land you once owned spread for acres with a flourishing olive plantation; today you are a nobody with nothing on your back.

Life doesn't get better  you can see the array of bullet holes all over the corpses. Your little sister who had picked up a stone to hit one of them [the stone still lies in that small closed fist] was shot too; the bullet pierced right through her forehead and now she is lying there cold and lifeless. What would you do?

Your father wasn't a terrorist; in fact, he wouldn't even hurt a mouse. Your mother didn't even follow the politics of the land. Your sister was, after all, a kid  it doesn't make much difference to them. The pain is excruciating; the injustice brutal, but no one cares. What would you do?

You walk along wounded in thoughts, bleeding in soul and you see another home, another family. A poor couple working very hard tilling the yard; a young man with medical journals; kids playing and laughing. The next day you hear that the Apache helicopters bombarded the refugee camp again and that house you saw yesterday was a target. "It housed terrorists and bred the infrastructure of terrorism," the news reported.

The young boy who wanted to be a doctor someday: terrorist? The couple planting crops: terrorists? The mother who had another life in her womb: terrorist? The innocuous kids: terrorists?

Dead inside

Another family labeled 'terrorist'; another family buried in the trench of injustice; another family perished into nothingness! You feel that pain again; the memories haunt again. You are tired and suffering, dead within, wanting it all to end.

Finally you meet some people who say they care. These people say they know what can end it all; what can make them be heard. They would tell you, "Strap yourself with explosives, and detonate in a busy Jewish street. The Jews will die and people will notice it. We will get attention and then people will start to care!" Now tell me, if you were in that girl's shoes, what would you do?

Frankly, it requires Herculean strength and a state of mind devoid of emotions to die a death where you are conscious you will explode into a million fragments. It cannot be easy; you have to strongly believe in a certain cause to do what they do. You have to suffer a great deal to cause so much suffering. You have to be dead inside before you can commit suicide in this manner.

It's like a trade off. The Israeli army [which receives patronage of the Israeli public] has killed innocent families and is killing many more innocent Palestinians daily, so why would Palestinians with shattered dreams think twice before blowing themselves up in a crowded place? When no one cares about them, how can we expect them to care about Israelis?

I'm not promoting suicide bombings. I am trying to understand their perspective. As the clock ticks, people are dying. Not just Palestinians and Israelis, but humankind.

So if we demand suicide bombings to stop, if we desire the demise of suicide bombers, if we really want to destroy the infrastructure of terrorism, and if we want to revive humanity, we first need to learn how to care.

RUHI KHAN is a business student but started writing freelance thanks to the popular media that oft buries truth deep under layers of 'diplomacy' and 'selective focus'. Her pen has strong faith in people's mobilisation to create revolutions. When the time comes to pick sides, hopefully we won't do it on the basis of religion and blind patriotism but truth and justice.