QUESTION TIME We all know that the process of choosing the cabinet is a tedious one, filled with intrigue, intense behind-the-scenes lobbying, satisfying power barons, robbers and brokers, politics of course, and a 1,001 other things.

But if  any of us had expected a major cabinet-shakeup, he must have been terribly disappointed. It was not even a reshuffle, a mere adding of a couple of names for the benefit of a couple of has-been parties - MCA and Gerakan

We are all grown-ups here - except for the occasional precocious, driven and persistent child who has the perseverance to go through a boring column like this one - and we know the score, right? Right. So it would be fair to say Najib... er, the prime minister couldn’t choose anyone he wanted, even if he wanted to badly.

Which got us sort of wondering - you’ve heard of the saying, an idle mind is a devil’s workshop. Who would Najib, I mean the PM, have chosen if he really, really had a free will to choose a dream cabinet, assuming he was interested in that in the first place?

That would take us into the realm of mind reading - and let’s admit it, we are so terribly poor at that sometimes we can’t even read our own minds. So we decided to play a mind game instead. Who would we have chosen if the choice were up to us?

Do please take this with a pinch - or a fistful, whichever suits you - of salt and in the spirit in which it is written, which is fun... and yes some none-so-subtle satire which we are sure won’t be lost on our intelligent readers out there.

By the way, this is really a dream cabinet, anyone can be in, even those in the opposition and prominent members of various organisations in civil society. So long as the person is Malaysian, he qualifies, and so long as he has the right qualities to become a cabinet minister.

Without further ado, we launch into the delicate task of putting up our own list of candidates - albeit incomplete - for what we might call our dream cabinet. After all, I am sure our dear readers will want to make some suggestions.

The list is in no particular order of importance, everyone on the list is important in his or her own way.

Youth and Sports Minister - Nicole David. She’s young, definitely qualifies to be called ‘youth’ unlike many other candidates who stand for the youth elections of our political parties. She’s smart - a straight A’s student, might even qualify for a cabinet post in Singapore.

Most importantly, she knows what sports is about. She is already among the greatest champions Malaysia has ever produced, lifting many squash titles - so many I have forgotten how many - and being world champion for quite a number of years now. She may be able to figure out how Malaysia might qualify for the World Cup.

Here’s our suggestion for the Home Ministry. Sometimes, more is better. So we suggest breaking up the Home Ministry into two - Police and Civil Liberties. That creates a kind of nice tension between the needs of national security and the need to maintain all of our civil liberties after having enhanced them first.

Police Minister - Hanif Omar, probably the most respected inspector-general of police (IGP) we have ever had. Hanif was the one who headed the royal commission on the police under the tenure of our former prime minister. And as a former IGP who enjoyed considerable support from the force, he is likely to be widely accepted within the force and could play a great part in its revival

Civil Liberties Minister - Zaid Ibrahim. This is the man who neither Umno nor PKR could control or tame. He has played many roles as a lawyer but has now mellowed and matured into a person who sees civil liberties as an integral part of our long development process into a nation.

He also believes in the federal constitution, especially before it was amended well over 100 times. He and Hanif will sit at the opposite ends of the seesaw that balances security and liberty and they are likely to hit a happy balance for us all - hopefully.

Information and Entertainment Minister - Raja Petra Kamaruddin. Yes, yes, this is a controversial choice. But please hear us out. Who else do you know who has provided so much information with such great entertainment that minister and minion alike rush to read his pieces. Imagine what he could do for information and entertainment if he were allowed to unleash his full potential!

Foreign Affairs Minister - AirAsia CEO Tony Fernandes. This is simply just the kind of person we need - one who can turn adversity into opportunity and an impossible situation into a golden chance. Just look at the budget terminal which is no longer a budget terminal.

Who could have given up his entire proposal for one and still got everything he wanted - by not even putting up a single sen. That’s what we call negotiating ability. Besides, he is an international personality and we predict that with this, it is a matter of months before AirAsia gets the rights to fly around the world and becomes truly global.

Turnarounds and Transformation Minister - We suggest an incumbent minister for this, former Malaysia Airlines CEO and current minister in the prime minister’s department and head of the Performance Management and Delivery Unit (Pemandu) Idris Jala. He is one of the few ministers who takes his job seriously and does the best he can.

Use him for any kind of situation where a turnaround is called for. Is our education shot to bits? Perhaps Idris Jala can turn it around just like he did Malaysia Airlines in a year - he may need more time though. Have our police and uniformed services become a bit fat around the waist and bit more cunning in the head? That may be a job for Idris. He will be a troubleshooter, heading where the trouble is and shooting them down - one by one.

But just a cautionary word for cabinet meetings. Tony and Idris (first names are more appropriate here) have a history so it would be advisable to keep them at least 10 feet apart at all times to ensure that they, well, don’t get physical. And, hopefully, Tony would pick up some diplomacy - even if it is blunt, it is better than nothing - from the Foreign Ministry stint.

An opinion on almost everything

General Criticism Senior Minister - Dr Mahathir Mohamad. Tun is a bit like us armchair critics - he has an opinion and vehement ones at that on almost anything. What better person to let loose on the government and identify all the things that are wrong, especially with all his experience.

Just one caveat, after he identifies the wrong things, get someone else to rectify it. He had 22 years and he could not do it, so that’s a job definitely for someone else. Take note, Proton, which misguidedly made him chairperson.

Minister for the Downtrodden - Michael Chong. I don’t think we need any further explanation for that. All of us are familiar with the hundreds of stories of help he has given to the oppressed and the underprivileged over the years. He deserves more than a medal - he deserves a minister’s position so he can continue with the good work.

Finance Minister - Nazir Razak, CEO of CIMB Group and the PM’s brother. This is a smart, dapper CEO who understands business and who appreciates integrity, intelligence and meritocracy, all of which are sorely lacking in the current cabinet. In fact he is a good candidate for the current cabinet except that’s he is considered politically unacceptable - you and I know what that means, don’t we.

And he will take some weight off his brother (he ain’t heavy, of course) who has this onerous ministry on his shoulders on top of being PM - even Hercules can only do so much!

Government Governance Minister – This goes to PKR’s Rafizi Ramli who is credited with unearthing a number of government mis-governances, including the infamous cowgate scandal involving a former minister. He has to put right all those things he finds wrong of course but before that he does need to unearth them first - that’s half the job and we trust he can get the other half done.

Corporate Governance Minister - Tony Pua of the DAP wins this one. This is the MP who has written the most - almost as much as we folks at KiniBiz -  about that dangerous creature called 1Malaysia Development Bhd or 1MDB which makes a job of regularly putting taxpayers’ billions of ringgit at risk. Well, if he can identify them, that’s half the battle won already and like Rafizi, we trust he can get the other half done.

Clean Government Minister - The clear winner is Bersih founder-chairperson Ambiga Sreenevasan, a former Bar Council president who dedicated a huge part of  her life to getting the government to clean up the electoral process. In our books that’s the right place to start and could become the spring board for lots of other clean-ups in government.

This is getting to be good fun and we could go on but unfortunately there’s only so much space and so many, or should we say few, candidates we can find. Perhaps, you, dear reader, might have some more ideas. Do let us know if you do.

If you consider yourself dream ministerial material and don’t see your name here, please don’t get offended or despair. Send us your name and resume and give us 12 good reasons why you should be included and we promise to consider you in the next round.

Back to reality. P GUNASEGARAM, joint CEO and publisher of business news portal KiniBiz , wonders how close we will ever come to a dream cabinet.