COMMENT | Persecuted Indians - the big pity party

COMMENT | Twenty years ago, Lingam was a grass-cutter who rode his bicycle from one house to another, looking for jobs. He was desperate to find at least three clients a day to cover his monthly expenses.

Having two young children, a wife, and an elderly mother at home, Lingam did everything in his ability to support them.

One day, as he was hopping from one house to another, trying to sell his services, Aunty Devi summoned him to her bungalow.

Through a short conversation over tea, she learned about his struggle and decided to offer him a permanent job as a gardener. The job came with a three-month trial run.

Lingam took the job as a blessing from the powers above. He decided to show his appreciation through his work. With Aunty Devi’s help, he learned more about flowers, plants, and gardening techniques.

As he ended his trial period working at Aunty Devi’s, he was given more responsibilities to handle. This included some repair works around the house and running errands around town. At times, she even trusted him as her personal chauffeur.

Growing from a mere grass-cutter to a gardener-cum-handyman-cum-chauffeur, Lingam’s confidence grew substantially. His earning power increased and so did his self-worth.

Aunty Devi took great interest in Lingam and his family. She often visited them on special occasions and paid special attention to his children.

During the school holidays, she encouraged him to bring his children to her house where she would spend time with them, asking about their studies and interests.

Aunty Devi spoke about the possibility of the children going abroad to further their studies if they stay focused at school and scored well in examinations.

The children who grew up pretty much sheltered in the shadows of their grass-cutting father and stay-at-home mother were fascinated with the hopes and dreams planted by Aunty Devi.

About 10 years down the road, Lingam proudly sent both his children to further their tertiary education – one to a public university and the other to a private college.

Throughout their studies, Aunty Devi continued to watch over them, assisting financially whenever needed.

Lingam’s children now work as professionals in their respective fields. They are both married and building families of their own. They own properties, cars, and live a comfortable life. Lingam’s children and grandchildren have a better future ahead of them.

Three years ago, he attended his final day of work at Aunty Devi’s. After months of declining his children’s request for him to retire, Lingam finally gave in.

It was finally time for him and his wife to relocate themselves, move into a new house bought by their children, and enjoy the remaining years of their life.

Before leaving on his final day, he held Aunty Devi’s hands as tears flowed uncontrollably. Her kindness not only eased his financial burdens all these years but changed the paths of the lives of everyone in his family, including future generations to come.

Aunty Devi was a proud woman that day. Being born into poverty herself, she and her family depended on the kindness of others to lift them up in life. Today, she managed to do the same for another family.

This story might sound like a television series from Astro Vaanavil, but it isn’t a work of fiction. Lingam and Aunty Devi are real people and so is their story.

I know Aunty Devi personally, as I do many others who share her spirit of kindness. Over the years, I have seen them continuously supporting those in need, playing a significant role in improving the lives of others.

One thing I do not see them doing is ranting and blaming others and circumstances, for the struggles endured by some members of their community.

Playing the victim card

Unlike ordinary people like Aunty Devi who are on a mission to empower the Indian community, I see Indian politicians continuously playing the victim card.

They bitterly go on and on about ethnic discrimination and institutionalised racism as the core reason hindering the community from breaking out of poverty.

I don’t know about you, but I am getting sick of them perpetuating the victimhood mentality.

To be frank, I think the biggest challenge facing the Indians, as we aim to grow as a progressive community, is having these leaders around.

Leaders who poison our minds with constant reminders that we are weak because we are oppressed.

It is easy to be a victim. It is easy to fill our minds every day with dark thoughts about all the injustices we have suffered.

It is easy to dwell upon the times we were bullied at school and called ‘keling’; lost a scholarship or placement in university; struggled to find a place to rent; failed countless job interviews; or did not get the blessing from our lover’s family, all because of our race and skin colour.

Constantly pondering past wrongs definitely fuels the victim mentality. And of course, to keep the victim mentality, we must stay angry and cling to all those depressing thoughts.

They consume our precious energy – energy that could have been used to empower us instead.

Our Indian politicians are doing us a great disservice by imprisoning us inside the victim mindset. According to them, there is no room for hope and we will never find a path to improve our lives. Heck, we may as well be in a locked prison with no key.

Sadly, many of our Indian people seem controlled by anger, thanks to our politicians. We carry our rage from childhood into adulthood, believing that we are oppressed and weak. And for everything that happens to us, we blame our skin colour.

If the elevator door shuts in our faces; if a waiter takes orders from others before us; if a stranger cuts into our lane – we blame it on our skin colour, never mind that it could be totally a coincidence.

Anger is poison

I am not denying the racism suffered by the Indians. As an Indian myself, I have endured it more than I care to admit. But I refuse to be identified as a victim and I refuse to be intoxicated by anger and rage.

My great-grandfathers were cotton weavers in India. They left everything in their village and came to Malaysia for a better life.

Everything I have today is because every generation since then decided to break the brutal cycle of poverty my great-grandfathers had to endure.

It is important for us not to get caught up in a victim mindset. Never blame others and the circumstances for us feeling persecuted. It is not always someone else’s fault when things are out of our control.

A victim mindset is one big pity party. Even if our politicians seem to enjoy playing the victim tune, let us not dance to it. We need to start seeing occurrences happening for us, not to us.

We must help our children grow up in such a way that they are not infected with the victimhood mentality. Spread kindness and help those within your reach to be hopeful, strong, and resilient.

It is not impossible for us to move from point A to point B in life. Many members of our community have done so successfully - Aunty Devi and Lingam are among them.

The goal is to believe that what we want in life is just a huge but extremely manageable step away.

All these years, it has been difficult for hardcore poor Indians to envision themselves living a better life and doing great things because no one around them is doing it.

But if we can get them to hope beyond what is typical – to see it and feel it – then that could get them to act and strive beyond what those around them are striving for.

When you are a young Indian boy/girl and you are constantly seeing and hearing Malaysian Indians being portrayed as poor, unemployed, alcoholic, thieves, gangsters, in jail, or dead, that limits what you believe is possible.

We can fight this, but not by continuously having a pity party, instead, we hold up the marginalised Indian community, highlighting their contributions and accomplishments.

What that does is give people a different view to see past the barriers being put around them.

Racism and ethnic discrimination are real but they are not solid barriers to our progress as a community. For years, politicians have played this victim card and crippled us into this self-loathing, self-defeating mentality which contributes to many social problems we have today.

It is time we stop listening to the politicians and purge the victimhood ideology. It’s time we get our people back on their feet.

FA ABDUL is a multi-award-winning playwright and director in the local performing arts scene, a published author, television scriptwriter, media trainer, and mother. Her ultimate mission in life is to live out of a small suitcase.

The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of Malaysiakini.

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