All the talk about polygamy and how much it is a Muslim man's right left out some very important points. Men who are polygamists and those who support polygamy conveniently claim that the practice reduces adultery and prostitution. Oh, really? Is polygamy really any better than adultery or prostitution?

Talk to any woman whose husband has taken another wife and children whose fathers have started another family with a new wife, and you talk to people with great unhappiness, anger and untold psychological damages. I have heard first wives say that polygamy is worse than adultery because it is an ongoing contract and society expects them to accept it. Polygamy means that there is public expectation for the woman to share her husband's body and resources with the other wives.

Arbibi Ashoy ( Simplistic to berate Islam for polygamy practice ) likens the problem caused by polygamy to alcohol or gambling. I beg to differ. The hurt caused to the woman and her children by polygamy is much worse because it is personal and psychologically damaging.

If we want to talk about a person's right, let's also talk about the woman's right to equality, to happiness, to keep her husband and all that he is worth to herself and her children only. There is also her right to not suffer public humiliation.

Marriage is not merely a contract between a man and a woman. Besides the physical and biological aspects of it, there is a social face to it, it is a contract of the hearts, it involves the sharing of resources and values, it involves a psychological and spiritual connection, caring and the shared burden and joy of bringing children into this world and raising them.

When a man decides to share his resources and body with another person, when the other person is not even accorded the right to do the same, that is a huge betrayal and rejection of the other person. That is unjust.

Even if Man made laws to make polygamy (favouring the male only) legal, how can you not call such an act immoral? After all, it is an act of betrayal and deep hurt not just to the wife, but to the children as well. No matter that the prophet allowed it under strict circumstances. That was a different time and place.

In those days, there were different circumstances at play. Many men (husbands, fathers, sons) were killed in battles and women and children living on their own were preyed upon by unscrupulous men hardened by the constant battles of the day. We are living in a different time. These days, the only reason for a man to take more than one wife boils down to pure lust, just plain disgusting lust.