I'd like to add a bit to what Polite Boy said in his letter about Malaysian public rudeness. He wrote: 'Locally, how many times have we gone into local shops but are not entertained because we 'look poor'? But as soon as some Caucasians walk in, though scruffy as anyone can be, the shop's whole sales brigade will pounce on them. You can see a different level of discrimination at play and it will only get worse'.

I'd like to chime in that, as a Caucasian living in (non-federal territories) Malaysia for two years now, I've never been pounced upon. (Perhaps I should be thankful?) Jesting aside, seriously, when I'm shopping at the market or stores, the attendants usually literally walk away - quickly - when they see me coming to ask for help. They don't do this to my local husband.

This is very distressing. As a foreigner many thousands of miles from home, and very unfamiliar with how things are here, I really need assistance, quite often, in trying to find things. Two days ago, just looking for simple balloons for a party for my young son turned into an extremely depressing experience with me in deep existential anguish about my 'home' and place in this country.

I'm sure this comes down to fear of conversing in English, and my weakness in Malay. Or local fear of 'orang putih'. Whatever. But I really wish from the bottom of my heart that people would be especially nice to those of us who are obviously foreigners. We are extremely far from home, our families, friends, and entire lives. We are very lonely in a foreign land.

Many of us are dealing with extreme culture shock, such as Africans and Americans, who come from a very publicly open and friendly culture. Despite our obvious need, it is so difficult to find friends (or even good service) among locals in our new home. It is very painful to see people who are paid to be there to help you turn and walk away when they see you coming.

My alienation and loneliness in Malaysia has driven me to seek out those who are obviously foreigners - blacks and whites are the easiest to recognise as far from home - and befriend them. I wish locals would also do this. Then again, if you have trouble being kind to each other, perhaps how can I ask for this...