"Which country do you like better, Malaysia or (the country I stayed in)?" This is a problematic decision I am faced with whenever I return to Malaysia during the summer holiday period.

I am currently 17 but I spent most of my years of childhood outside of Malaysia. Growing up overseas really widened my cultural tolerance and opened my eyes on just about everything.

Having spent more than 10 years abroad, studying in international schools, I grew up surrounded by people of different cultures, and people like me are more widely known as “third culture kids” (TCK).

To answer the question I posed earlier, I'd say that my preference changes from time to time. I always tend to miss the country I'm not in at that moment.

Indeed, separation from a country evokes my yearning for the friends there, my home there, the food there, and so on...

Nevertheless, comparing countries as a whole would be similar to juxtaposing apples and oranges.

However, there is an advantage of being educated as a TCK. Compared with my local friends and relatives who have been educated in Malaysia, I am relatively more open.

Opening up to new values and thoughts

And no, I don't mean ‘open’ as in the way I dress or my perspective on romance. Here, I'm referring to opening up to new values and thoughts and the will to carry out new changes.

Exposure to completely new people from time to time is in fact a good way to prepare yourself for life later on, when one is forced to interact with strangers in his or her working life.

I'm still not entirely confident of myself, but with each introduction I make with strangers, I move one step forward with expanding my comfort zone of people.

What I've noticed with my local friends and relatives here in Malaysia is that a lot of them lack the confidence to make the first move when meeting new people.

"But I don't know them well..." is a common reasoning I hear. Well, how will you ever know the person well if you don't even want to talk? I don't blame them for that in anyway, for I realise that they lack the exposure I have.

I asked them what they do in school in English classes, and they respond with the same old list of writing essays, reading, and grammar.

"What about public speaking or presentations?" I asked. Some replied that they have done those too, but it was rare.

Overwhelmed by the tuition they have, many of my friends here don't have time to do other things. Maths tuition, English tuition, foreign languages, ballet classes, piano classes, karate lessons, and the list goes on.

Kids indulging in endless tuition

Are those extra lessons truly helpful? This really stammers the students' responses. Some of the serious cases of "no life" students go to school in the first half of the day and attend tuition classes in the second half, returning home at around 11pm.

Many of my overseas friends are shocked at this, and I too am still appalled by their long studying hours. How do they even finish all the work allocated?

I really sympathise with these kids as I know for a fact that indulging in endless tuition programmes will never prepare one for the life ahead.

There's no need to be specialised in every subject in school, but more importantly, it should be a comprehensive understanding of the essentials of the subject and not a hard core memory test.

I would suggest that our schools adapt a more interactive teaching approach and let the students have a go (and hopefully, more than once) at essential skills required at work/college - such as learning how to make speeches, doing projects as a team, and so forth. I find these skill sets to be more helpful throughout my years in school.

Of course, grades are crucial for university applications, but in the long run is it really a guarantee of a successful life?

So why spend the brightest years of childhood buried completely under tuition? After all, how much of the things memorised in school are needed in the life ahead?

SHIMIN OOI is an intern with Malaysiakini .