COMMENT | The arrogance of power

COMMENT | A few days ago, I booked a GrabCar, trying to avoid the hassle of having to find a parking spot in the city. The car arrived almost instantly.

In order to satisfy the five-minute waiting period given, I had to rush down eight flights of stairs, not wanting to waste any time waiting for the lifts.

While racing down the stairs, I received a few text messages from the GrabCar driver. The first message announced her arrival at my condominium lobby. The next few sounded rather odd as the driver wished to know if I had anyone else tagging along.

I decided to ignore the text messages as I thought it was none of the driver’s business. I mean, although I was going alone, there was no need for me to inform the driver. Aferall, I booked a four-pax GrabCar.

The driver was already standing next to her Proton Saga as I reached the waiting area. She smiled, bowed, and greeted me friendly, introducing herself as Jasmine.

I thought she was acting rather peculiar because, well, no GrabCar driver would stand outside their vehicle to welcome a passenger - not even a five-star driver!

As Jasmine drove the car out of my condominium area, she apologised for sending me the text messages, adding that she was relieved to see only a passenger walking towards her car.

“But this is a four-passenger car, right?” I asked, slightly confused.

“Yes, miss. But you see, I met with an accident yesterday afternoon and my front passenger door is now jammed. I did not have enough time to get my car repaired. I was afraid if you were arriving with three other passengers, you might complain to Grab.”

I felt sorry for Jasmine, especially since she seemed to be very genuine and sincere. So, I asked her what had happened.

Jasmine took a long sigh and simply responded, “It’s a long story, miss. I might just get frustrated all over again if I tell you.”

Now I was intrigued even more.

“This lunch time traffic looks pretty heavy. Come on, tell me Jasmine. We have all the time in the world for your long story.”

She laughed and agreed.

Jasmine’s story

Jasmine is a 58-year-old former engineer. After losing her job during the pandemic, she tried different jobs before becoming a GrabCar driver some three-months ago. Her husband also lost his job and has been driving a GrabCar since a year ago.

Everyday, Jasmine takes a break from her duties to send meals to her 84-year-old mother who lives in the same neighbourhood as I do. Her mother lives alone with a sibling, refusing to move out from Jasmine’s late father’s house.

On the day of the accident, Jasmine had just returned to her car which was parked across the road from her mother’s house. While she was buckling her seatbelt, her mother’s 70-something-year-old neighbour rammed his car right into Jasmine’s while reversing out of his house.

According to Jasmine, this wasn’t the first time her mother’s neighbour had done so. Apparently, for the past 40 years or so, the same neighbour has been bumping into Jasmine’s family cars repeatedly.

It began with Jasmine’s late father’s car, and then it was her sibling’s, sometimes a relative or a guest’s car would end up scratched or dented if not worse.

The accidents happened so often that it had become a running joke within the family of whose car was going to be the next victim.

“What happened after he knocked on the passenger side of your car?” I asked for more clarity.

“The same thing that has been happening for the past 40 years!” Jasmine replied.

The neighbour got out of his car and upon inspecting his own imported car, walked towards Jasmine and took out his wallet.

“This much would be enough to fix that,” he said as he passed her a few notes.

“Uncle, I am a GrabCar driver now. How will I work if I send my car to the workshop?” Jasmine complained.

The man then threw another RM50 note and told her that it would be more than enough to cover a half day loss of income.

While my jaw hung loose in disbelief, Jasmine explained that the neighbour was a wealthy man. He was also a terrible driver. Over the years, Jasmine’s family had taken many efforts to avoid these unnecessary accidents, but they continue to happen because the man is just so reckless.

Bargaining with the man

In the earlier days, Jasmine’s father requested the man to be extra careful as his children used the same road to ride their bicycles. However, the man replied that it wasn’t his problem and that the children should be the ones riding carefully.

Later on, Jasmine’s mother would ask the man’s wife for a favour, hoping that she could talk to her husband about driving carefully in and out of their house. Unfortunately, no one in the neighbour’s family wanted to ‘advise’ the man.

“Sorry, if you have any issues, please take it to him. We don’t wish to interfere” – was the common reply received.

Over the years, for the sake of being a good, friendly neighbour, Jasmine and her family tolerated the neighbour’s nuisance and arrogance. Their home was precious to them and so moving elsewhere wasn’t a possibility.

“The uncle is now living alone with his wife. All their children live elsewhere. I feel sad too for him because, unlike my mother, he has no one to depend on. He has to drive himself to places,” Jasmine continued.

I asked her why she was feeling sentimental for the arrogant man. Afterall, he had been a nuisance for over 40 years, even when he was much younger, stronger, and sharper. It was as if it was in his nature to be arrogant.

“What did your family get in return for tolerating his arrogance?” I asked.

Jasmine looked at me from her rear-view mirror and remained silent for a while.

“Sometimes our tolerating nature fuels those arrogant pricks even more,” I continued.

“I just don’t want problems. If I had argued with him after the accident yesterday, he might have brought it up with my mother after I had left. I don’t want that.”

I asked Jasmine if she had thought of a scenario where, God forbid, her mother is taking a walk by the roadside when the man decides to recklessly reverse his car. What would happen then?

“I know, I know,” Jasmine replied remorsefully, almost as if she was regretting her decision to share the story with me.

I left Jasmine, wishing her all the best, and apologised if I had said more than I should.

Standing up to arrogance

I felt sorry for her and her family for having to endure an arrogant neighbour who thinks he is superior to others for more than 40 long years. I felt sorry that she has made a habit out of tolerating him, not wanting to risk losing whatever little she and her mother have in their home.

Jasmine’s arrogant neighbour reminds me of some people I know. These people use their power to satisfy their pride and overconfidence. They have no respect for the law, they have no compassion for others especially the needy, and they ignore our culture of tolerance and acceptance. They only think of themselves and no one else.

I hope Jasmine finds it within her to stand up to this uncle and let him know that his arrogance will only fail him.

I hope all of us do the same and stop tolerating arrogant pricks, be it a neighbour, a friend, a colleague, or even a leader.

Like Jasmine, we all need to do what's best for ourselves and our loved ones.

FA ABDUL is a multi-award-winning playwright and director in the local performing arts scene, a published author, television scriptwriter, media trainer, and mother. Her ultimate mission in life is to live out of a small suitcase.

The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of Malaysiakini.

YOURSAY | ‘It's time to retake the country from the thieves’

YOURSAY | This Merdeka we must stand up for our country

Yap refuses to apologise, calls Bernama CEO 'arrogant'

COMMENT | Najib, the man with the 'tainted touch'